Sarah had another common problem. She thought it was her role to make everyone else happy. After reading Fast Track Real Confidence and sing the cards, she had this to say.
I never thought of myself as a martyr or a doormat or a victim. I was just a mum—a pretty good mum. However, when I joined the journal-writing classes, I wondered why I found it hard to relax into the role of motherhood. I did not think I was doing anything wrong. But something was not quite right.
But what? It was only when I started writing that I realized that I felt I was responsible for my family’s happiness. This was a huge insight—just knowing that I had that attitude. I was only as happy as the unhappiest member of my family. Once I discovered this, I had another major insight. It is not my job to go on other people’s journey for them. Maybe I can help them, but I can’t do it for them. Their lives are really their responsibility. What an eye-opener! And I cannot tell you how much more I am enjoying the family now. Thank you It came to me that I was always putting myself down. I thought that this would make others like me more. What I did not realize is that words have power. Speaking words out loud can build me up or bring me down. I did not need to go further down! What you say you will become. If I say ‘I always get that wrong’ or ‘stupid me’, that is what I will become—either wrong or stupid or both.
I have my journal writing and my cards to thank for that insight.
I love looking up different quotes and writing about them. Here is one quote that kept me writing for ages. ‘I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinion of himself than on the opinion of others’. (Marcus Aurelius)